Hmm
Mom is only happy when there is the prospect of a man on the horizon. The only time she doesn't fight with me is when she is feeling like acting the part of the 'Great Mom' so as to impress future would-be's.
And yet, I seem to hate every single man she brings home. They are all trash and she can't seem to see that. Then this cycle begins when they break her heart and we must deal with terribly bitchy mom once more.
Please lord, don't let this continue the rest of my life ...
Sometimes I want to call my dad, and scream and yell at him that I am mad with him. Im so mad at him, and I don't say anything because I feel bad for him, and I think his life is bad enough at the moment without having his daughter say he is the biggest disspointment in her whole life.
But the truth is, I am mad at him. And what I want to do more than anything is tell him. Scream and yell at him and remind him that he is my father. Not some stranger to see on the streets. He's responsable for us.. and he is sitting back and being a wallflower in the midst of pure hell.
Sometimes I want to just call him and cry and beg that he could at least, for me of course, pretend to be in love with mom again so that she will be happy again and I will have my family back. And then I realize I sound like one of the dumbest, most selfish people on the face of this earth.
So then I wonder what it makes my mom when she wakes up crying for him still?
4 comments:
..human. your mum is human.
Daddys do suck sometimes.
but they are daddys nontheless.
so we HAVE to love them.
<3.
Sleepover=soon..
alcohol included. kay?
At least you know him. And he would be there you know that as much as i do if you ever really needed him. Hes not a bad person his prioritys are just all mixed up right now.
You are not selfish at all. Your just trying to think of ways to make your family better, closer. Your caring for your family and not just for yourself. You think things will be better if your mom and dad go back together even though they fought so much they were still in love and your family were still together as one. My mom goes for the grossest guys as well and i think that my dad was the one and only one when maybe he was but he is obviously not with my mom for a reason. He and she dont love eachother anymore but probabaly wonder "does he/she still have feelings for me?" Maybe they do maybe they dont but they are just cowards not to ask for them selfs. But my dad got married and so did yours and you know your dad moved on and you know your mom was upset when they got married,you could see it in her eyes couldnt you? mine was she bought booze the day my dads bitchy girlfriend was gonna walk down the aisle.
ahy
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