I Just Want You To Know

Kat and Jess had spent tech class fooling around yet again. They accomplished nothing on thier website project, they only managed to screw it up a bit more. Instead they spent the class listening to music online. With Tori doing the air guitar in the background.

Even though the music wasn't that loud, the whole class could hear it. The tin-like beats echoing off the desk.

And I don't want the world to see me, 'Cus I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.

Tori's favourite air guitar song.

She walked through the door to her house and was hit with a sudden breeze of smoke. Dad lay on the couch, dead to the world, sleeping off whatever he had had to drink the night before. Lissa, chicken-pox infested, was curled on the couch wrapped up in blankets crying, her face a shade lighter then usual and her pox a tad bigger then before. She motioned for Kat to be quiet as she threw her books down on the floor.

"Why's he sleeping Liss? Isn't he supposed to be babysitting you?" It was easy to act non-chalant about it all. She dared to glance over, and he was there like he always had been.

Again, Liss stuck a little finger up to her lips. "Dad said we have to be quiet." she whispered. "He said he was 'hung-over'. Wanna watch Hulk with me?"

"No."

The window's weren't opened, the house was a mess, and there he slept when he should have been caring for his sick daughter. It seemed so 'familair'. He was there, in real life. Not like the way he had been when he had only been there in objects. But he wasn't. He wasn't there for them anymore. And for once, she realized she didn't care.

"Wanna see my room Dad?" She asked later on. He was throwing his olive green coat over his shoulders, the same one she used to curl up in when they went fishing, the same one that smelt like a mix between moth balls and old spice.

He picked it apart. Right from the pictures of poster boys to the drawings she had done. He called it a disaster, mocked the people on her walls..

The radio was still on from that morning. It was on quite low, but yet she could hear it over him. The tin-like beats echoing off the walls.

And I don't want the world to see me, 'Cus I don't think that they'd understand. When everything's meant to be broken, I just want you to know who I am.

He probably had snooped that day, just like her mother had told her. She had said to hide anything that her Dad might be able to hold against her. Yet Kat didn't. She left just enough out to let her Dad have a good idea of who she was. He picked it apart, but only from habit. He just picked things apart.

Our relationship is something the world wouldn't understand, Kat thought as she locked the door behind him.

"Wanna watch Hulk now Kate?" Liss's stuffy voice drawled from the livingroom. "Dad fell asleep right away when he got here. I even made myself Lunch! Wanna bite? It's real good, I swear..."

She just nodded, cleared the plates and wrappers, and sat down. On the tv a picture of a peice of paper blended into a picture of a lizard.

"It's funny when things turn out to be something else." Melissa said, more to herself then anything. But Kat knew who she was talking about.

It was easy to forget.